This past weekend the world lost iconic fashion designer Oscar De La Renta. The accolades and remembrances continue to roll in from fashion journalists and celebrities, and all share a common view of what made him a genius. His talent was in making sure the woman was the focus, not the dress.
How does that apply to weddings? Well simply put, as you plan make sure you’re the stars of the show: you and that wonderful person you’re marrying. Your ideas for details and décor are wonderful, but make sure that the look you and your florist create doesn’t overwhelm the most special, unique feature of the event – that’s your love and happiness! Like De La Renta’s beautiful gowns, the design should beautifully flatter, but not overtake you. After all, you’re what everyone’s come to see. Not the ice sculpture.
It’s perfectly natural to want a more lavish wedding than you can afford. The internet wedding and television world has raised the bar. Add the desire to have amazing photos for friends to admire on Instagram, Facebook, etc. and you have couples planning beyond their means. The finance world, ever predatory, has come up with a “solution:” wedding loans. They are a terrible idea both financially and emotionally. Let’s explore why.
Financially, there’s no worse way to start your life together than by adding debt. What a terrible wedding gift to each other! The easy solution that brings immediate happiness will be a terrible choice down the road when buying a home or car and you are still paying off loans from a party you had long, long ago. Are you going to be glad then that you made that sacrifice to have beef instead of chicken?
Emotionally, the potential for fighting over money in a marriage is high. If either one of you is the slightest bit unsure about taking out a loan for the wedding, down the line that’s going to come out and be a point of contention. And it will be a point of contention that will follow you in your relationship until you are completely out of debt! I wouldn’t want resentment over a loan floating over my marriage, that’s for sure.
So there are my reasons I am against wedding loans. I am sure there are people who use them responsibly and find them very helpful. If you’re interested, make sure you read the terms very carefully. For the rest of you, go make a good budget!
So I’m flipping through the LA Times and I see that they’ve shoe-horned a little wedding section into the paper this past Sunday. It’s your usual assortment of articles, the charming quirky dress saleswoman at Saks, the etiquette of putting photos on Instagram, nothing that those of us who actually make our living doing this haven’t written about a hundred times. But there was one piece that really stuck out. It was the obligatory “What’s new & hot in weddings” article. It illustrates my whole problem with the idea of “hot wedding ideas”
Titled “Weddings from a Simpler Time,” the piece describes the “boho chic” trend, and discusses such elements as mason jar centerpieces, wildflowers, picnic tables, and popularity of the craft marketplace Etsy.
Love the boho chic mason jar look? So do we! We don’t care if it’s trendy, we want your wedding beautiful and you happy.
Um, LA Times? 2010 called and wants its wedding trend article back. They write that “one out of every four weddings in 2011″ had this vintage type theme. Are they aware that we are approaching the end of 2012? Don’t they know editors have moved on to Roaring Twenties/ Great Gatsby weddings? Here’s my take- it’s still beautiful, whether or not it’s “popular”
Now if you read this blog, you know how I feel about trends. Basically, they are all well and good, but I really think brides should have weddings they and their partners love, not that are dictated to them by the editors of magazines. And this article goes to show why! They often have no idea what they are talking about. The people who see the trends as they develop in the field are the designers (hint – us)! We can help you find the pieces of what’s new that fit into a look you already love to keep your wedding fresh and unique. So this Halloween, read the magazines, just keep in mind they aren’t sent from on high. As the LA Times demonstrates, sometimes they are the ghosts of wedding trends past! And who believes ghosts should design your wedding? No one.
