What Martha Stewart Doesn’t Want You To Know: Wedding Advice Books Exposed

I brought two wedding books to the store yesterday to add to our growing library. (Yes, My Little Flower Shop, top Palm Springs florist, is building a wedding book library)! Looking at books with our brides gives us a chance to prepare them for the inevitable moment of panic in the ‘Weddings” section at Barnes and Noble.

At any bookstore in America you’ll find glassy-eyed people in the wedding section, not knowing which way to turn. Seriously, it’s worse than the paper towel aisle at the grocery store. (What’s on sale? Is that the cheapo brand?  How may rolls in the pack? Are they Mega-Rolls?)

If you know what to expect, you won’t be discouraged by these experiences of book-overload.   So, knowing that the mountain of information you’ll face,  keep these tips in mind.

  • Wedding planning books are not required reading, and 99.9% of what’s in them probably doesn’t apply to you. (Are you inviting Norwegian royalty to your wedding? Didn’t think so).

    Reading Offbeat Bride

    Reading Offbeat Bride (Photo credit: Aron Meudt)

  •  Once you’ve got the books, (and this is the important part,) they do not need to be  followed obsessively to the letter. They are not written in stone. They were not given to us at Mount Sinai.
  • Books should be considered guidance, opinion and advice. From someone who doesn’t care if you ignore them.
  • How about looking in the library? If you find one you love, buy it. If not you’re not out $35.00 for a book you don’t need.

Bottom line? Talk to the vendors you’re working with! Their advice is the most valuable of all.  In terms of how they do weddings, and work with their clients, well, they wrote the book.

Be well, and love well.

-Dinah

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My Little Marital Bliss Shop: Never Stop Dating

Cadillac CTS Coupé Concept

Cadillac CTS Coupé Concept (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Who’s dating your man? It had better be you honey boo boo child, before, during AND after the wedding.  He was beguiled by your charm and fun personality, and fell in love on dates with you. Keep the initial spark alive by still going out regularly- and I don’t mean some kind of obligatory once-a-week dinner that you drag yourselves through. Snooze fest. Think about what you really enjoy doing together, or separately, and have some adventures! You can go as far as a weekend get-away, or stay as close as your own kitchen, but be creative.

Recently I told my husband we were going on a mystery outing. He had no idea where, but loved trying to guess!  He’d been talking for the last few weeks about wanting to test-drive a Cadillac CTS Coupe, so I had found a local dealer, and we went on a “Sunday Drive” to go take a look.  He was very surprised that I would even come up with such a thing, and was thrilled to pieces. The date was a hit because it was something he was really into, and it warmed his heart that I had been listening.

If your imagination is running a little slow these days, The Dating Divas have a website chock full of ideas to spice things up. (No, not that way. Get your mind out of the gutter). They have themed dates, bargain dates, at-home dates for after the kids go to bed… you get the idea.  So go out and get dating!

Be well, and love well.

Dinah

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Who Should the Bride Be On Her Wedding Day? Herself!

Often brides have a tough time figuring out what they want to look like on the big day.  Sweet, or seductive? Classic, or modern?  Here’s the key.  You want to look like yourself!  Your groom fell in love and proposed to you because of who you are – don’t present some exotic version of yourself on the day of the wedding because of some fashion trend or pressure to create dramatic photographs.

Here are three important questions to ask yourself about your look on the big day including your bridal hairstyle, wedding dress, and make-up.

  • Are you comfortable?  Looking like you walked off a Paris runway isn’t worth having your dress duct taped to you and your hair pulled so tight it gives you a migraine.  Most of us don’t live in cultures where it’s a badge of honor to get bruises from your elaborate wedding dress, so find something that fits well, and feels good!
  • Will your fiancé recognize you?  Do you look like a glammed up version of yourself, or like someone you’ve never met?  Your man wants to see someone familiar underneath all the trappings of bride-dom.  Keep in mind you’re dressing up for him after all!
  • Don’t go for broke.  Debt is not cute.  If you can’t afford a hair and make-up team, or a $5,000 dress, don’t charge up a storm on credit cards.  If your look is important to you, compromise on other budget items to make sure you have the resources you need, or investigate ways around the expenses like bartering for services, or renting a designer gown.

If you stay true to yourself, keep your wits about you, and follow your heart, you’re sure to be a beautiful, comfortable, solvent bride!

Be well, and love well.

Dinah

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